Friday, February 22, 2008

i can be fixed

the queen street fire has been put out and residents have been allowed back to the ruins. i walked by it twice yesterday and both times the feeling i got was the same feeling i got when looking over ground zero in new york. this pictures make me realize that i am lucky and there really isn't anything that can't be repaired in my world.

time will help. talking about it helps a lot too. i finally told some people at work and lauren and i went for drinks and girl talk after work last night. i'm waiting for the sadness to go away and for the anger and acceptance to come. i talked to eliza just now and she didn't tell me to "get well soon" because she knows it will take longer than i want it to.

i didn't cry before falling asleep yesterday. maybe it was the guiness. i ate a random mish mash of food at work yesterday to lay down a liner for drinking and i ended up waking up with stomach pains and grumblings all throughout the night. still, it wasn't a bad night.

i uploaded pictures from the last night gareth and i were out with some friends. he probably will be annoyed that i posted them because we're very much a couple in those pictures still but i don't care. i needed to get them off of my camera and i wanted to posted them. i guess i just needed to know that we were together and happy and the entire facebook world needs to know that too. it was good therapy just to get them posted. blogging is really good therapy right now too.

i think i'm getting happier again. i'm not crying so that must mean i'm getting happier. even if that's not true, i'll keep telling myself that until it is.

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